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member since 2014

Recent Reviews38 total

Ruckus Recreational - Capitol Hill

7/18/2016
Before I say what I think of this shop, let me take a second to make a comment in regards to the one star reviews on this shop complaining about prices. Is Ruckus on the pricey side? Yes. Why are they on the pricey side? Because they ONLY carry HIGH-END products. You will be hard-pressed to find at least half of their selection of growers at other places. Ruckus is designed to provide you with the highest quality of unique growers. They don't seem to want to be commercial shmucks selling you the cheapest eighth they can find for profit. I LOVE Ruckus because they know what is good. They have the best and most consistent selection of growers in the city. They admire cannabis and talk to me about why they like the growers they carry. They are some of the most knowledgeable people I've met in this industry, not only understanding each strain, but having a story behind every grower as well is just on a completely other level of customer service. I have NEVER left here disappointed. I know that when I walk into this store that I'm going to have a fun, light-hearted conversation about their products. What's new? What's your personal favorite? What is this strain like? This amazing ability that the budtenders have to talk in-depth about each product is the best thing I can ask for. So people, if all you want is cheap, don't go to Ruckus. If you want an experience, Ruckus is the way to go. One of two shops that I've actually returned to thanks to their customer service and selection. You guys keep on keeping on with the keep on. Love the place, the people, and the product.

Cannabis Provisions Inc. - Shoreline

7/18/2016
Look, I'm picky. I also take forever to make decisions because I want everything but can only afford so much. So for me, I need a place where I have a little time to look at products and talk to the budtenders about the products they have. I've been to a majority of shops in Seattle, and of the ones I've visited, this is one of two that I've actually returned to. It is upstairs, and it has two sides to it, which helps feel like I don't need to rush when other people come in. The shop's atmosphere is pretty chill. There's a couple throw pillows shaped like big bags of weed, which were REALLY awesome, on some nice cushy chairs. I want those throw pillows. The shop has kind of a home-y vibe of sorts. The budtenders were really friendly. I felt welcomed. Like I said I'm picky, so I usually come in with four or five strains that I want, but hope the budtender can help me choose which two to choose between the five. I get very annoyed if I ask what a strain is like and all the budtender can muster is "oh yea thats a good indica high." Like thanks?? Luckily, I've never had this experience at this shop. These budtenders are extremely knowledgeable. They had something different to say about every strain Ive inquired about. It's fantastic. They've never steered me wrong. I've gotten a product that has wow-ed me every time I leave here. Most of their grower selection seem to be pretty unique; I hadn't seen a lot of them anywhere else before. So all in all, THANK YOU guys for being awesome. I love being able to have a no-rush, in-depth conversation with the budtender about products, and this is one of the few places where I've been able to do so. Keep up the good work! Also, budtender whose name I don't remember, I LOVE your adventure time hat! Also, you're cute. Cupcake out. *drops mic*

Fire OG

7/16/2016
The city is under attack! Dr. Doom is at it again with his mischievous and stress-inducing ways. You and the rest of the Fantastic Four rush onto the scene. But oh no… He set a trap! How conniving! Ben! Reed! SUSAN!! Everyone but you is captured. “That's it! You're going to pay Doom!” You breathe in. You take the fire within you. Hold it in. Harness it. Then… FLAME ON!! The euphoric flame starts between the eyes where it spreads out from there. It glides over your head, over your shoulders and chest, eventually encompassing your entire body. The warming sensation lightly tingles your skin. Your mood shifts, and you focus all of your attention on Doom. He will pay for this injustice! He will pay for all his crimes against humanity! You take flight! The lift off is so powerful it leaves a circles of flames in the cement. You fly through the sky, circling Doom. The wind pressing firmly against your face. The flames being pressed backwards. As your velocity increases, trails of fire appear behind you. You continue to circle Doom, surrounding him with a burning wall of flame. You concentrate some of it to your hands creating a swirling fireball. You toss one, two, three fireballs at Doom. BOOM BOOM BOOM! All direct hits! Wait… But he’s ok?! Doom attacks! You narrowly dodge it. This needs to end now! You speed up. Swirling the wall faster and faster. You move higher up and close it off at the top, completely encasing Doom in a tornado of flame. You grab the top and pull the ENTIRE tornado off the ground. You fly up to the clouds with it in hand, then, pause. You twirl the flaming tornado around like a track athlete spinning to launch a discus. Then, you hurl it. You hurl it at Doom like Zeus does his lightning bolts. The tornado spirals faster and faster, its speed increasing at every second, eventually causing pops and rips in the air around it as it breaks the sound barrier. Doom, knowing he can’t dodge it, braces for impact. BBWRRRRCCCHHHHH!! The raging flames strike Doom. Encasing him, engulfing him. “AHHH! This isn’t over!” As the flame finishes devouring it’s meal, it evaporates, leaving nothing but a scorched spot on the pavement. Doom is gone, completely incinerated. You take a sigh of relief and relax. Your muscles unwind. Your intense focus calmed. You find peace. You’ve done something well and saved not only your friends but your city as well. A contentful grin spreads across your face. Then, you suddenly realize that you were so focused on this task that you missed the bus to get to your regular human job. Crap.
Reported
feelings
ArousedCreativeEuphoricFocusedGigglyHappyTingly

Purple Haze

7/15/2016
You’re standing there. A large mass of people completely surrounding you. And they're all here sharing a common interest. You're all here waiting. Waiting for the man of the hour. You’re excited. You're ready. Maybe. THERE! Step one, step two. You're excitement builds. Energy growing. Step three, step four. A smile widens across your face with every step. He's coming! He's coming! You can hear fly contain your bliss. How is this happening?! Is this real life?! Step five...step six. It's him! The one! The only! JIMI HENDRIIIIIIX!! The first note strums. It's beautiful sound impacts you right in the face then bursts out the other end, traveling through you like a rushing river of euphoria. The overwhelming bliss creates ripples in time eventually having it cease to exist. {Purple Haze, all in my brain| Higher dosing, time don't seem the same| It's all funny, but I don't know why| Excuse me, kiss sobriety goodbye|} Every word, every note is a new feeling. A new meaning. A new direction on the path to internal El Dorado. The music doesn't just lift you, it glides you, guiding you through the complex structure of your mind. {Purple Haze, music sounds| Intensely better until I comedown| Am I happy or in euphoria| Whatever it is, this strain put a spell on me|} Excitement and energy build around you and inside you, working together as one. The people around you have mentally disappeared. There is only you, happiness, and Hendrix. {Purple Haze, behind my eyes| Didn't know I could feel this right| Thoughts-a-flowin’, creative mind| Is it psychedelic, or just a feel good time|} You feel otherworldly. Your senses all buzzing at once. How can you feel such wonder? Such amazement and awe? {Ooh, ahh Purple Haze|} As the last note strums, the grin of complete satisfaction appears. The show is over. The initial change of pace and energy is a little jarring at first, but after that, the everlasting happiness eases you back into reality. You know you've been somewhere wonderful, and the impact will leave a you with an immortal, vivid memory of that euphoric place.
Reported
feelings
CreativeEuphoricHappyHungryTinglyUplifted

Blueberry Silvertip

6/24/2016
You are five. Yes, five years old. And you just had a lot of candy. No, no, a BUTTLOAD of candy! And everybody knows what happens to kids on sugar, right? Well, you don’t because you’re five, but you’re about to find out in... 3… 2… 1… The brain has now succumb to the possibilities. The explosion of energy expands from the mind where it travels rapidly down your spine delivering euphoric goodness throughout your body. Any tension in the muscles is lifted. Your head begins to swell with endless ideas. What do you do with them all? Which idea is the best? Then, you realize… They’re all the best. And you can definitely do them all. You quickly throw on your hockey mask and chest piece. And nothing else. You don’t need much when you’re a GORILLA! Ooo Ooh *bang on the chest* Ooh Ooh. Eat a banana! Aww yea! That’s the stuff. Throw it on the ground! You take off the hockey gear. You’re now swimming underwater. Hi fishies! Oh wow, you can talk to fishies, like Dory! Wait… what was I reviewing? You jump off the mountain and soar through the sky like a pterodactyl. No, you ARE a pterodactyl. No! A velociraptor. NO! A T-REX! RAAAAAWWWWRRR!! But wait T-Rexes can’t fly. You fall to the ground and hurt your butt. You go to rub it, but your arms are too short. You know what that means! It’s time to bring Captain Helper-Guy to the rescue. You throw off your street clothes disguise and toss on your signature blue suit with silver tips. You are HERE TO SAVE THE DAAAAY! (yes, it must be said like this or it doesn’t count) Your heart pure with goodness. Your eyes narrow like a hawk. You see all. You feel all. You help all. But what’s this?! Oh no, not your only weakness. Not… a bedtime! Mom turns off the lights. As you lie there, the sugar begins to wear off. Luckily, you had that good-good kind of sugar, so you aren’t left with a crash and burn. Instead, you slowly descend all lolly jolly like with a grin on your face.
Reported
feelings
CreativeEnergeticGigglyHappyRelaxedTalkative

Alien Dawg

6/16/2016
Why is this strain called Alien Dawg? Because it makes you feel like an alien, dawg. You just passed your spaceship driver’s test, and mom and pop alien are finally letting you take the spaceship out on your own for the first time. The galaxy is yours. This is what freedom feels like. You can go anywhere you want now! “Don’t go to the Dabula Quadrant, it’s too intense for the ship.” “Yes, ma.” You can go ALMOST anywhere you want now! Zzvvrroooom! And you’re off! It’s so smooth. As the ship breaks through the planet’s atmosphere, you straighten it out and soar through the emptiness known as space. Your head gently rests on the seat as you fly past planets in your solar system You watch the stars and colorful nebulas from your peripherals as they glide past in the distance. It’s peaceful. Tranquil. There is so much that exists in the universe. So many corners still unchecked. What is the purpose behind this vastness? PEW PEW! Oh no! Space pirates just shot at you! You put the ship in full gear. Your head slightly presses against the headrest. Your body pulled into the seat as the ship moves faster and faster. PEW PEW! They’re getting closer! You curve around planet Kushiter. You have to jump to hyperspeed or you won’t make it! PEW PEW PEW! You have to do it now! You focus in. Switch on the capacitor. Start the flux generator. Engage the voltron power cell. Steady the galactic tracer. Power the supersonic blastoid resurger. And… PUSH THE BUTTON! *flash* In hyperspeed, the force from it presses your head very firmly against the headrest, and your body starts to tingle. Your face and eyelids get heavy. You begin losing focus and start drifting. Then, CRASH! You crash the ship into your house. You’re flung from it face first into your pillow, where you are overtaken by the reminiscent tingly body sensation and mental drifting. Sleep young alien.
Reported
feelings
EuphoricFocusedHappyRelaxedSleepy

Flo

1/30/2016
Goggles on. Air tank attached. Flippers secure. And jump! You splash into the water. Engulfed as it surrounds your body. As the immersion settles in, you find your bearings. There seems to be something curvy in the middle of the ocean right there. You start swimming towards it. Hmm... it seems to be a little bit harder to move than you remember it being not under the influence of water pressure, but it's not impossible. It is only water after all. It's not like you were stuck under a rock or some... WHZEEOOOM! That curvy thing turned out to be an underwater current! And now you're in it. WEEEEE!! As the current pushes you through the ocean, you feel the water press firmly against your goggles. You feel it glide over your shoulders. As you continue to soar through the ocean, you are whizzed by sights you've only ever seen on National Geographic. Colorful reefs. Exotic fish. Dolphins getting high off a puffer fish. You bro fist one of them. You can't believe the sights you've seen. So much information. Such little time to observe. Then the current spits you out of the ocean. Yea, straight out of it like Compton. You fly through the air, crash through the roof of your house, and fall right onto your couch where you're writing reviews for weed.
Reported
feelings
CreativeEnergeticGigglyHappyRelaxedTingly

Acapulco Gold

9/29/2015
The sun is now within you. You carry a flaming ball of gas within your body. So, you’re dead. Just kidding. Somehow, your body has become immune to combustion. Now, the sun is your to harness. It radiates throughout your body, providing you with a light warmth. The light rays shine directly out of your eyes. It focuses your view and brightens the colors around you. Luckily, you’ve also converted to being solar-powered rather than be wasteful using less efficient resources which go through a long process of making, consuming, transferring it into energy, then letting out waste which is all compiled in a hill somewhere. And that hill is getting too full. So now you walk around your day, powered by the sun, feeling it glow inside you. You’re focused and feeling better than ever, almost like… gold.
Reported
feelings
EnergeticEuphoricFocusedHappyHungryUplifted

Platinum Cookies

9/24/2015
You sit down in your comfy chair. You recline it and snuggle in. There’s a small switch at the front end of the left armrest. You click it. The chair begins to vibrate. Oh yea, that feels good. It massages you from head to toe, bathing you in mind-blowing relaxation. The sudden release of stress with the rapid rise of euphoria causes you to giggle. Then, you giggle again because you just giggled. Then, you giggle again because of how silly you look giggling to yourself. (Now the word giggle sounds weird. Giggle.) As the full body massage continues, the giggles start to wear off. You grab the hot towel that is conveniently located right next to you and place it over your face. The warmth releases any lingering stresses, and you fall into bliss with a mind and body synchronized in relaxation.
Reported
feelings
CreativeEuphoricGigglyHappyRelaxedTinglyUplifted

GG4

9/23/2015
You are a body of water. Your waves lap against the shore and become bigger as the wind picks up. But Gorilla Glue walks over to you, then gently touches you with it’s finger creating a ripple that traverses over your entire being. This ripple halts your waves and movements. The wind dies. A picture perfect reflection of the stars and moon appears on your undisturbed surface. You have achieved peace; a calmness, serenity, tranquility. (thanks thesaurus) As you lie there calm under the night sky with no waves to deal with, your mind follows suit in the tranquility. So you’re able to reflect on life as crystal clear as the reflection on your still surface.
Reported
feelings
CreativeEuphoricHappyHungryRelaxedUplifted