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member since 2022

Recent Reviews1 total

Organic Alternatives

1/27/2022
While I risk impending doom from my employer by posting a review regarding a cannabis store - since typically the default assumption is that if you patronize this kind of establishment, then what you're likely purchasing is flower - this review is important so I'm taking the chance. I have a Colorado med card, the reason being that, on the medical side of OA I can purchase this pain relieving balm, called Nordic Goddess, for less than retail. It's a body balm created to "break down the cannabinoids to a molecular level, enhancing absorption into skin for maximum relief." It has rapid absorption but does not everrr end up in your bloodstream. Ask any nurse. (Side note: I personally know a particularly stellar nurse who, for reasons that remain private, submits a urine sample to her employer at the end of each week. That sample always has a negative result, and she uses this balm on the daily.) I swear by this balm because prior to my soulmate dying of cancer, I was introduced to it by the paragon of budtenders at OA, and it relieved a shocking degree of pain during his treatments. Please stop what you're doing and give them a call, if you want a truly reliable and extraordinarily effective pain-relieving balm. And no, I don't own stock in either the manufacturer or OA, nor am I on the board of directors (I wish). They would also not hesitate to run over fresh hot coals from the belly of Mt. Vesuvius to make it right for you, in the extremely infrequent situation that something goes awry with your order. I have picture proof that they do this - and the photos are awe-inspiring. Additionally, although I've never seen the application for employment at OA, I'm fairly convinced that one of the required skills on it states that to be successful, at minimum you must be one of the sweetest, most intelligent humans in Colorado, with the uncompromising patience of a Saint, because everybody in the store knows more about the products than the googles ever will. And your interactions with them will leave you feeling like you just caught up with a good friend. But if that's not something you want or need though, their laser-focused perception won't disappoint you. Sincerely, if I had your address and you wanted to be pampered in a cannabis shop, I would personally drive you there and introduce you to a fairly magical experience. Last but not least, in their meticulously designed backroom, you are going to receive, by comparison, Louis Vuitton quality products at a very reasonable Lucky Brand price. They are incomparable as far as Larimer county is concerned. Thanks for reading this massive novel of a review!